Selfie 101: Why you need Cellfy

Over 109,641,050 photos on Instagram use #selfie.  That’s more than double the population of England.  That is ridiculous.  I began browsing the category in hopes of truly understanding why so many people post photos with their arms showing and face missing.  I came to zero conclusions.  Instead, I thought I’d examine the first 11 selfies, all of whom had public profiles,  I came across and explain to the world why you should use #cellfy to make these photos slightly more bearable.  But first, let me take a selfie.

Miley Cyrus, I don’t want to see you arms in the reflection of your sunglasses.  Just stick cellfy to the wall and throw a peace sign or something.  Selfie improved.

Edgarallan_ho, first of all, classy name, second of all, you’d be able to fit in the picture if you used cellfy.  Wasn’t the point of this to show off your new shorts?

Nathan_kayde, I guess JustinBieber was already taken, but I’m sure your fans would love if you used cellfy so they could see more of you and less of that ugly mirror.

masita_direction you’re kind of missing half of your face and a good 1/4 of the person next to you, the best selfies have a 1:1 face in picture ratio, use Cellfy, you’ll figure it out.

giselle_victoria, your kid is a baller, I’d appreciate it if you used Cellfy so I can get a better view of his Elvis impersonation.

bobbys_mundo, it’s Bobby’s world and were just living in it, but I bet Bobby would use Cellfy, that way his underarm tats wouldn’t get cut off by the camera.

reimers94 super cute pants, but are they capris? I can’t tell because the camera angel cuts off.  If you had a cellfy you could have stuck that sucker to the wall and we would know if capris were in.

kiddify, I would really enjoy if you gave use your best Arnold Schwarzenegger impersonation, get a Cellfy so we can see the gun show.

ms_feanna is a selfie queen, but her duck face would be way better if she didn’t suffer from Bradley Cooper syndrome.  The people want more duck face.  The people demand Cellfy.

almendracerpa, I appreciate that you took a selfie while shopping, and if you were using Cellfy, we could have seen more of the store behind you which was obviously the subject of the photo.

Go get a cellfy and do us all a favor.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s